Musings

Today was one of the coldest (and windiest) days we’ve had all winter. It’s really weird to think that exactly two weeks ago it felt like springtime and everyone was out in their shorts and T-shirts.

Anyhow, in spite of the cold, it was a bright, beautiful day, and I was determined to enjoy a weekend with no school work (since the semester is ending on Monday, and I’m done with my grades.) D and I went to the Metropolitan Museum and wandered in and out of many galleries, looking at whatever caught our interest.

We were in the American Wing in the late afternoon, when a lovely golden light was coming in through the skylight.

For me, this shot seems to represent a time of endings, and the bitter-sweet feeling that goes with them.

Another semester is ending, and in a few days I’ll have new students and new classes to teach. It’s always hard for me to say goodbye to my students, even though I know I’ll see them around in the hallways (and possibly in my classes again). I think each combination of individuals makes for a unique feeling and atmosphere in the classroom, and its something that can’t be re-created.  I have to part with each class’ special energy at the end of every semester, and it always makes me a little sad.

The end of the semester is full of so much giddiness, exhaustion, and hectic-ness, that it is hard to really think about that loss, and give it the respect it is due. Plus, I am terrible at good-byes, and I never quite know what to say or do to part with a class at the end of our last hour together. I usually give my students a chance to write me letters about how they felt about the semester, and at times, I have wrote with them and then read them my letter to them. Even though I am the teacher (or maybe because I am), I find it hard to find the right words to say to them to show them how much I’ve enjoyed them (even if they pissed me off at times!), and learned from them, and truly wish them the best for their futures…

And then, the new semester is starting, with the nervousness and excitement of new classes, and a 2 new curricula to teach that I’ve never taught before, and a fresh beginning, which is both daunting and hopeful to think about.

And of course, there is the probably even bigger ending-and-beginning of moving out of our apartment, and moving in to a new place, which is looming closer and closer on the horizon.  But I can’t get into that too much now because it will only make me more nervous.

So, I’m glad I had this nice day with D and the museum and even the cold wind.  It was a little oasis of vacation in the middle of a time of changes.

After school on Friday D and I were walking across midtown when I stopped in front of the plaza of a shiny, bright new-looking building. D informed me that it was the Bloomberg Tower, which is located between 58th and 59th Streets on Lexington Avenue. It was completed in 2005, but I guess I have never noticed it before. It looks very nice at night, especially with the lights in the offices above changing colors, and their spiffy Christmas tree out front.

Bloomberg tower, tree and taxi

Looking up

In the middle of a cold and long-feeling week, I like to remember that just a few days ago I was hanging out in Central Park in a t-shirt, taking pictures. Soon, it will be the weekend again, right?

Yesterday it was 72 degrees in New York. It was January 6th. Some people blamed global warming, and others just went out to enjoy the unexpected gift of springtime in the middle of the winter. (And others did both.)

D. and I went to Central Park to take a walk in the afternoon, wearing just T-shirts. There were tons of people around, the light was beautiful, and the air was warm and pleasant. It felt like May. It was very strange, but being someone who hates the cold, I found it hard to complain!

This winter hasn’t inspired me to take a lot of pictures (even though it’s been unseasonably warm all winter this year). I think a combination the stress of the school year, trying to buy an apartment, and running around a lot over the holidays has made it hard to get out with my camera. But yesterday was a perfect day for taking it easy and walking around, so I dusted off the camera and did some shooting.

Pattern of tree trunks

More trees in Central Park

Stripes

Trees and Shadows

Among many other things, it is very absorbing.

There is really no way to think about personal problems and tragedy while you are explaining something to a classroom of people, or walking around the room and making sure everyone understands what to do, or checking that no one is using their cell phone or sneaking out of the classroom. Plus, I enjoy my students a lot this semester. They make me smile a lot and most of them are working really hard. They have a great attitude and good ideas. They take my mind off other things. In a good way.

This week, D’s grandmother had a stroke and passed away a few days later. She was a tough, feisty, admirable old woman. She lived to age 99 (and a half) and she never stopped giving people a hard time. I will miss her.

Obviously, D’s family is grieving for her and missing her a lot right now as well. It has been hard for me to watch D. suffering, and to feel that I can do little to help. It also brings back a lot of my memories about my own grandmother and her death, which also came suddenly and left everyone in my family feeling stunned and empty for quite a while.

It hasn’t been an easy week. But I have appreciated the distraction of being in the classroom, doing my usual thing and dealing with the usual difficulties. Teaching feels like the most normal thing that has happened all week. And in spite of the stress and craziness at school this week, it was comforting to me.

I know the holiday (shopping) season is here because the Time Warner Center at Columbus Circle has already hung their Christmas-stars display from the ceiling. The stars change colors in time to loud Christmas songs, and attract lots of attention from  tourists and other midtown mall-goers.

I couldn’t resist taking a couple of pictures. Tacky as it is, it has it’s own appealing look…

The blue stars are my favorites

The reflection in the window and the view of the fountain at Columbus Circle is pretty nice.

I haven’t been out taking pictures for a couple of days, but last weekend I trekked around quite a bit of the Upper East and West Sides of Manhattan. It was the day of the NYC Marathon, which was difficult to get good pictures of because of the crowds everywhere. Instead, I opted to find some more peaceful places. Here are a couple of my photos. To see more, click on any of the pictures to go to my Flickr page.

Fall colors in Central Park

The East River and 59th Street Bridge at dusk

Here are some of my photos from this weekend, many of which focus on New York’s buildings.

Empire State Building and the New Yorker Hotel

Skylight at the Jacob Javits Center

An autumn tree in New York

San Remo reflected in the Central Park Reservoir

Autumn scene in Central Park

East River, looking East at Roosevelt Island. (If you look carefully, you will see the lighthouse.)

59th Street Bridge at sunset

Since we changed the clocks last weekend, I have been seeing less daylight and more sunsets. Here are some of my recent photos of dusks, evenings and/or reflections in late-autumn in New York.

Light’s Reflection

Chandelier at the Metropolitan Opera

Halloween sunset in Jackson Heights

Halloween sunset in Jackson Heights

Time Warner Center

Movado Clock and Lincoln Center

Movado Clock and Lincoln Center

After the man who had been talking to me left, I thought I would have a chance to focus on grading papers again.

It worked for a little while, but I was already a bit tired and distracted.

Then a young teenage girl and her mother sat down next to me. The girl looked like she was about 14 or 15 years old. She was wearing makeup and carrying a chocolate-y, caramelly hot drink. Her mother looked like a savvy New York woman. She was drinking a green tea, which she announced to her daughter is very good for you as they were sitting down.

Her daughter responded with a big sigh.

“I don’t think I want to go on the trip Mom. Ms. X is so annoying!”

“What does she do that annoys you, honey?”

“She’s, like, always watching everything we do. She’s too strict. I mean, I don’t want to go all the way to Europe just to have her bossing me around all the time. Mom, I heard that there’s a curfew, and you can’t even go out of the room after that time! And, I swear Mom, she won’t even let me talk to a boy. She thinks as soon as you start talking to a boy you are doing something wrong.”

“Sweetie, it’s her job to watch over you. I mean, her job is on the line if something happens to you. It’s not like she’s a parent. She could get fired if something happens to you. She’s just protecting herself.”

I swear she said those words, “It’s not like she’s a parent.” I was thinking, right, not like a parent who could care less what happens to you. I mean a parent can’t get fired, right? So what difference does it make?

“Mom, this trip is going to be so BORING!”

“Well, you can stay at home if you want. It’s your decision. But I won’t be able to be with you, and I don’t like the idea of you being alone all day long at home. Why don’t you think about it a little more.”

“It’s Ms. X, she’s so ANNOYING!”

“Maybe I can talk to her, honey, and tell her not to be so strict with you. If she has my permission, she can just be strict with the other kids.”

“Mom, at the school dance I was grinding with Jason and she just kept WATCHING me. Just sitting there and watching me.”

She proceeds to paraphrase this sentence at least five more times. Each time the word “grinding” gets a little louder and more pronounced.

“Sweetheart, maybe I can talk to her. I don’t want her to ruin all your fun. But first think about what you want to do. I don’t want to talk to her if you’re not going to go on the trip. It is a lot of money to go to Europe, and it’s not worth it if you aren’t going to have a good time. But on the other hand, I think you might be bored if you stay here. There are some nice kids going, right? Isn’t Jessica going?”

“Mom, Jessica is so ANNOYING! She’s very competitive about boys. She’s always trying to get, like, every boy in the class.”

“Well, you don’t have to worry about that. You have plenty of boys. She just throws herself at them, and the boys don’t like that. Honey, she does that because she’s not very pretty. She has to do that to get their attention.”

“Yeah, Jessica’s ugly. She has to throw herself on a boy to get one.” She starts to giggle.

Mercifully, they left soon after they sat down. Occasionally, I feel awfully fortunate that I don’t teach privileged American high school students.